the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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