Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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