I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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