He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Randomize
