Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I don't deserve a penis
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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