i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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