somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
