I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
jump out the window naked night went bad
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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