yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
