nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
These tits shall not be calmed
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
