Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
