He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
