So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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