paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
