I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
