Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
NoShamevember. You game?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
