Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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