you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
