Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
