Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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