Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize