My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
