So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
