I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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