You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
