you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
