eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
