try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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