I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
