So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
