just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
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I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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