found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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