Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
