oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
