just come out here and I will go home with you...
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I made him laugh his dick is mine
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