can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize