Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
