we have officially lost it.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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