You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
