I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
