I want to make a zoo with you.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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