hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
