Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize