i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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