HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
