i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
