am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
