Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize
