Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
