Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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